The Ten Commandments for Runners

So, this was a post that a friend of mine posted on a writer's critique website. He gave me permission to publish it here on my blog for all you readers to enjoy. I promise, I'll get 6-10 out of him. :) Enjoy! 

Commandment #1

I am the road, thy pain. Thou shalt have no other surfaces before me.

Runners live for the road. Unfortunately, they also tend to die for it… and on it. That wonderfully hard surface that gives you aches and pains, shin splints and runners knee… Without the asphalt road pounding our ligaments to pulp, where would we be?

The road is a necessity when first starting out running. How else can you get support? Vehicles rush past you, almost clipping you when they zoom! past. Go on a treadmill? That just wouldn’t be proper. Besides, you would miss out on the adrenaline rush you get when you race sports cars down the main drag—your neighborhood lane.

Commandment #2

Keep holey thy running clothes.

You all know how a runner is supposed to look like! Tattered shirt from your first marathon, still emitting odors from previous runs. Muddy shorts and socks from the mud that you didn’t expect. Perhaps even a hat promoting your favorite football team—not your favorite marathon. Diversity is important in a runner as well.

Commandment #3

Thou shalt wear bright shoes.

I would go into detail about it—which brands, colors, designs, perhaps even dig a little into the practicality of certain footwear—but I think it all fades to the background when faced with the most important aspect of shoes.

Whatever you buy must be bright—no exceptions.

Commandment #4

Honor thy marathon medals with a day out.

When you do achieve this rare status, this magnificent achievement that few can boast, you will earn a medal. A medal is meant to be worn, not laid around the house or left inside a memory box to collect dust! Wear it to the office, to town, running—everything.

Your friends may think you are crazy, but that is an automatic assumption.

Commandment #5 *

Thou shalt not let thy run be quiet.

We runners have a reputation to uphold here. Don’t let us down with your neophyte ideas and go off on some adventure of your own. Sure, be adventurous, but follow a pattern.

All runners must listen to music while running. Now that doesn’t mean that there is a certain song that must be played. It’s your choice, of course! Only one thing is necessary. Your device, no matter what brand or model, must have the capability to be heard at least a mile away.

If your device is not capable of completing this task, take a hammer to it. Such possessions would shame a respectable runner.

You know you're a redneck if...

So, a lot of people call themselves (and call others lol) rednecks but very few people actually know what a redneck is. Lucky world! You've got me here to give you the definition! :D

You know you're a redneck if...

1.) You are sad because you only own 10 AR-15's.
2.) Refined and sophisticated beer is Budweiser or Budlight.
3.) You can tell a story about every dent you have on your Toyota Tacoma.
4.) You are worried about the front of that same Tacoma after you hit a deer (who cares about the deer?!).
5.) Dinner is 3 shots of whiskey.
6.) Dessert is tequila.
7.) You have to really search through your closet to find clothing that isn't camo.
8.) You are actually excited when the Zombie Apocalypse hits, because that means the 50 cal. machine gun will be put to some good use.
9.) Haircuts are something for only civilized people.
10.) Your entire property is rigged with barbed wire fences and boobie traps for unsuspecting victims.
11.) You don't have a sign on your front gate warning visitors to "Beware of the dog". Instead, you tell them to "Beware the owner".
12.) Every corner of your home has a rifle (or two or three) leaning in the corner.
13.) A hunting trip turns into a severe hangover. ("Somebody" forgot to take the beer out of the back of the pickup.)
14.) You don't actually hunt. You drive into the middle of nowhere and then sit in the truck, waiting for any unsuspecting animal to cross your path.
15.) You have a reputation for shooting anything that moves.
16.) You've had this reputation since you were a child.
17.) Your grandpa has made you eat everything you killed since you were two.
18.) Your first bite of food was rattlesnake. (You killed it.)
19.) You can't understand the way a "civilized" person thinks.
20.) You base a person's character off of the kind of truck they drive. If they don't own a truck, then they shouldn't be taking up space and air on this earth.


Well, I hope this helps. Granted, this only covers the basics but it's a start, right? :D lol
See you guys next time!

I'm joining NaNoWriMo!!!

I am officially a part of a national group of writers! Today was the kick-off party for my region and I learned a ton about this great "contest". Follow this link to learn more about it. www.nanowrimo.org  

Anyways, I have absolutely no idea how I'm supposed to finish this challenge in 30 days but I will be getting some great support from my online "writing buddies" as well as from my friends and family, so I'm very hopeful. :)

I'll be writing a novel about Anne Bonny and her part in the Golden Age of Piracy. I'm writing it as historical fiction so some of it will not be necessarily true. Now, we all know about those terrifying female pirates!!! The ones who told their husbands at the gallows, when they left their wives to fight alone, "I am sorry to see you here, but if you had fought like a man, you need not have hanged like a dog." Very powerful words! They show a fighter's soul underneath and I will do my best to capture that spirit.

Well, I'm sorry for such a short post, but I've got to go start writing. :) So, wish me luck!

Survival Tips 101

Wow! Today was scary. Last night, our kitchen faucet started sputtering and then stopped giving out water altogether. Mr. Fix-it and Sons went outside to check the well pump and discovered that the pressure switch had burnt out. So into town they went to buy a new one. This was all at nine at night, mind you.

They got back and put the switch in. Then Mr. Fix-it and Sons tried turning on the water. Imagine their surprise when the water didn't respond the way they wanted it to! After poking and prodding some more, they discovered that the well pump itself was officially broke.

By this time, it was going on ten o'clock. They decided to call it a night and clocked in. The following morning, they were back on the job.

All this time, we had no water. We did have about thirty gallons of water stored in our garage, but that only goes so far when it's stretched among thirteen people. We had to refill them twice over at our neighbors' house.

So, while our toilets were out of service and running water itself was a mere memory, I started to think. What if this were permanent? What if, say, an EMP went off over the Midwest and shut down all the electronics? I'd be out of water for more than just a couple of hours. I could be out of water for a couple of months, maybe even a year.

I realized that my family and I needed to be more prepared for the future and perhaps, even get ready for a future completely off-the-grid.We needed to learn how to be Cave Men. We needed to be Survivalists.

My Family

Hey everybody!

It feels like forever since I last wrote on this blog. Actually, I think that it was forever. It's been like two months!

So, I thought that I would write about myself, just this once. Okay? I lead a crazy life full of twists and turns, most of them being 90 degree turns. Why is my life so nuts, you may ask? There is one very simple, crazy, nutty, fun, impossible, lovable, and just plain awesome answer: my family.

My family has (brace yourself)......13 members! Each one of them is very special in their own way. Together we are a team, a well-oiled machine. It's crazy how much we can all accomplish when we all work together.

My mom and dad used to get dirty looks and rude comments from people whenever we went out into public. They were told that they were over-populating the planet, that they were just "another Duggar family." Their answer to that was always that they were just accepting the gifts that God gave them.

I'm extremely grateful that I have a large family. Just think about how boring life would be! Instead of waking up to my little sisters ringing a bell in my face (I may have overslept just a bit lol), I would wake up to complete silence. Like I said, BORING!!!!

So yeah, life here is exciting, with new things happening everyday.